Whack Ass Weekend 3-29-09
Diaper shopping
I was picking up some diapers for my nephew the other day and I couldn't find his brand. I am still a little unsure how a 6 month old already has brand loyalty but I have to follow sisters orders and purchase the correct ones.
Anyways, I was getting weird looks from the people passing by me when I was looking at the "poo garments." I am use to this because I feel that I look too young to have a baby and I get these looks every time I purchase something for my nephew. Then I realized why I couldn't find the specific "mobile toilets" that I was hunting for. I was looking at diapers for adults! These people weren't giving me awkward looks because they thought I was too young to have a kid, they were doing it because they thought I was too young to shit my pants. But the jokes on them because I shit my pants all the time!
I hate Cats
Well, thats not entirely true. I like one breed of cats. THUNDER!
Rubber popes
Pope Benedict recently came out and said that the distribution of condoms will not help the fight against AIDS. Pope B is retarded, but he has given me a wonderful business idea.
Are you ready for it?
Here it is... Pope Bene-is-a-Dick Condoms.
Maybe if I let him take a needle and poke holes in them he would do some commercials for the product.
Sign that I am getting old
My booger to nose hair ratio has flipped. I feel like I am pulling out more nose hairs than boogers these days.
Weirdest argument
Thanks to the movie, The Watchmen, I just got into an argument on the phone with my father over how many times we saw a blue penis. I thought they only showed the thing in one scene but my dad was sure that he saw the "glowing member" a solid five times. Even better was my mom screaming in the background, "I think I saw the blue weenie 7 times!" Mom has always had an eye for the details!
Clip of the week
Just when you thought war couldn't get any more cuddly.
I was picking up some diapers for my nephew the other day and I couldn't find his brand. I am still a little unsure how a 6 month old already has brand loyalty but I have to follow sisters orders and purchase the correct ones.
Anyways, I was getting weird looks from the people passing by me when I was looking at the "poo garments." I am use to this because I feel that I look too young to have a baby and I get these looks every time I purchase something for my nephew. Then I realized why I couldn't find the specific "mobile toilets" that I was hunting for. I was looking at diapers for adults! These people weren't giving me awkward looks because they thought I was too young to have a kid, they were doing it because they thought I was too young to shit my pants. But the jokes on them because I shit my pants all the time!
I hate Cats
Well, thats not entirely true. I like one breed of cats. THUNDER!
Rubber popes
Pope Benedict recently came out and said that the distribution of condoms will not help the fight against AIDS. Pope B is retarded, but he has given me a wonderful business idea.
Are you ready for it?
Here it is... Pope Bene-is-a-Dick Condoms.
Maybe if I let him take a needle and poke holes in them he would do some commercials for the product.
Sign that I am getting old
My booger to nose hair ratio has flipped. I feel like I am pulling out more nose hairs than boogers these days.
Weirdest argument
Thanks to the movie, The Watchmen, I just got into an argument on the phone with my father over how many times we saw a blue penis. I thought they only showed the thing in one scene but my dad was sure that he saw the "glowing member" a solid five times. Even better was my mom screaming in the background, "I think I saw the blue weenie 7 times!" Mom has always had an eye for the details!
Clip of the week
Just when you thought war couldn't get any more cuddly.
Posted by Brad Ass at 3/29/2009 3:47 PM 
Categories: Whack Ass Weekend
Tags: cat shit one whack ass weekend rubber popes blue penis pope condoms
Categories: Whack Ass Weekend
Tags: cat shit one whack ass weekend rubber popes blue penis pope condoms
It is not always the same thing to be a good man and a good citizen.
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You must not think me necessarily foolish because I am facetious, nor will I consider you necessarily wise because you are grave.
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Noble life demands a noble architecture for noble uses of noble men. Lack of culture means what it has always meant: ignoble civilization and therefore imminent downfall.
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Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke.
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When we lose one we love, our bitterest tears are called forth by the memory of hours when we loved not enough.
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Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
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There ain't no free lunches in this country. And don't go spending your whole life commiserating that you got raw deals. You've got to say, 'I think that if I keep working at this and want it bad enough I can have it.'
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Joy is prayer - Joy is strength - Joy is love - Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls.
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Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
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I have often wished I had time to cultivate modesty... But I am too busy thinking about myself.
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