California Makes No Sense
California Fires
I'm in California and supposedly wind here causes fire!? I am not joking. I was watching the news last night and the weatherman said its "Santa Ana Wind Season and we all know that means fire."
Ummmmm really?
Wind Means Fire?
I know it spreads fire but I don't think wind creates fire. Think there is something missing from the equation, like a spark or dumb kid lighting a squirrel on fire. It is like in that one South Park episode where the Underpant Gnomes keep stealing underpants for profit and their equation for profit was, Underpants + _________ = Profit. So, California's equation for fire is Wind + ________ = Fire.
But No Shit! The next day there were like 3 huge brush fires. They had to close down an Interstate. I was sitting on the beach and ash was falling on me. I am just happy it didn't fuck up my tan.
So, this means all it takes in California to make a huge fire is a bunch of wind. That means there are a bunch of natural sparks consistently going on out in the brush. Just sparking all over the place hoping for some sort of "seasonal wind" to blow by and turn it into a catastrophe.
They also say that the Santa Ana Winds are characterized by how dry they are. What they hell is a dry wind? Have you have described a breeze in terms of moistness?
Hey Bob! it sure is windy out today?
Oh Yeah Steve... How moist is that wind?
(Steve does not reply to Bob because after Bob asks him how moist the wind is Steve thinks Bob is fucking retarded and never wants to waste a single moment of his life with Bob again.)
OK so wind causes fires out here in California. I can come to terms with that as long as no other weather related things have to do with unrelated results.....
"It's Been Earthquake Weather Lately"
Now What the hell does that mean?
I actually heard a few people say this. Most of them said it after the earthquakes, but seriously? Earthquake weather? What is that?
I don't know if I can live in a state where weather causes fire and predicts earthquakes I might have to move again. Plus I like to do things that are unacceptable out here such as... I like to bend the brims of my hat... I prefer to wear shirts that have logos in the traditional spots not scattered all over the fucking place,
"Cool shirt Skylar. What Brand is that?"
"Oh! how could you miss the logo. It's right here inside the armpit."
I Still Love it Here
It never gets colder than 60 degrees. The Burritos are awesome and the beaches are free. The gods might smite the place with weather that predicts earthquakes and fires caused by wind but as long as it doesn't start raining frogs I am going to try and stay.
I'm in California and supposedly wind here causes fire!? I am not joking. I was watching the news last night and the weatherman said its "Santa Ana Wind Season and we all know that means fire."
Ummmmm really?
Wind Means Fire?
I know it spreads fire but I don't think wind creates fire. Think there is something missing from the equation, like a spark or dumb kid lighting a squirrel on fire. It is like in that one South Park episode where the Underpant Gnomes keep stealing underpants for profit and their equation for profit was, Underpants + _________ = Profit. So, California's equation for fire is Wind + ________ = Fire.
But No Shit! The next day there were like 3 huge brush fires. They had to close down an Interstate. I was sitting on the beach and ash was falling on me. I am just happy it didn't fuck up my tan.
So, this means all it takes in California to make a huge fire is a bunch of wind. That means there are a bunch of natural sparks consistently going on out in the brush. Just sparking all over the place hoping for some sort of "seasonal wind" to blow by and turn it into a catastrophe.
They also say that the Santa Ana Winds are characterized by how dry they are. What they hell is a dry wind? Have you have described a breeze in terms of moistness?
Hey Bob! it sure is windy out today?
Oh Yeah Steve... How moist is that wind?
(Steve does not reply to Bob because after Bob asks him how moist the wind is Steve thinks Bob is fucking retarded and never wants to waste a single moment of his life with Bob again.)
OK so wind causes fires out here in California. I can come to terms with that as long as no other weather related things have to do with unrelated results.....
"It's Been Earthquake Weather Lately"
Now What the hell does that mean?
I actually heard a few people say this. Most of them said it after the earthquakes, but seriously? Earthquake weather? What is that?
I don't know if I can live in a state where weather causes fire and predicts earthquakes I might have to move again. Plus I like to do things that are unacceptable out here such as... I like to bend the brims of my hat... I prefer to wear shirts that have logos in the traditional spots not scattered all over the fucking place,
"Cool shirt Skylar. What Brand is that?"
"Oh! how could you miss the logo. It's right here inside the armpit."
I Still Love it Here
It never gets colder than 60 degrees. The Burritos are awesome and the beaches are free. The gods might smite the place with weather that predicts earthquakes and fires caused by wind but as long as it doesn't start raining frogs I am going to try and stay.



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