ROAD LAWS

Alabama

-It is illegal to drive while blindfolded.

Alaska

-It is illegal to tether a dog to the roof of a car.  I wonder if it's okay to attach him to the bottom.

Georgia

-Officials in Dublin,Georgia, have made it illegal to drive through playgrounds, even if it is a playground for cars.

North Carolina

-It is illegal to drive through a cemetery if you’re not there to dig a grave or bury someone.  If you get caught doing this hopefully you have a passenger... and maybe a gun and shovel.

California

-It is illegal in San Francisco to buff or dry your car with used underwear.  No matter how sparkly clean it makes the car.

-No unoccupied vehicle may exceed 60 miles per hour. 

Massachusetts

-You will be ticketed if you drive with a gorilla in the backseat of your car.

Missouri

-It is against the law to drive with an un-caged bear in the car.  Not sure if I would rather drive with a bear or a gorilla.  People in Missouri and Mass are just bad ass I guess.  

Tennessee

-It is illegal to fire a gun at any wild game other than whales from a moving car.

SEX LAWS

Bakersfield, California

-Anyone having intercourse with Satan must use a condom.  No matter how much he tries and convince you otherwise.  I know he is a smooth talker and it feels better but dude has been around the block a few times.

Romboch, Virginia

-It is illegal to engage in sexual activity with the lights on.  Must not be the most attractive people in Romboch.

Willowdale, Oregon

-It is Illegal for a husband to talk dirty during sex.  Fuck ME!

Newcastle, Wyoming

-Couples are prohibited from having sex in a butcher's walk-in freezer.  It is even worse if you are having sex with the butcher's wife.  Never a good idea to commit adultery with someone whose husband is a professional at cutting tube steak.

Nevada

-It is illegal for any member of the Nevada Legislature to conduct official business wearing a penis costume while the legislature is in session.  (insert-politicians are dicks anyways joke)

Connorsville, Wisconsin

-It's illegal for a man to shoot a gun when his female partner has an orgasm. YEEEEHAW!!!!  weird... I just had a disturbing mental imagine of the Rich Texan from the Simpons

Washington, D.C

-There is a law against having sex in any position other than face-to-face.  People in DC must be a lot better looking than in Romboch.

Oblong, Illinois,

-It's punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.

Hong Kong

-A betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. (The husband's lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.)  This sounds like a great reality show.

Cali, Colombia

-A woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.  

 BOOZE LAWS

North Dakota

-It is illegal to serve beer and pretzels at the same time.

Pennsylvania

-The law prohibits a man from buying alcohol without a note of permission from his wife.

Fairbanks, Alaska

-It is against the law to give a moose any kind of alcohol.  Note to self... cancel trip to Fairbanks.

Texas and Ohio

-Have banned the sale of Fat Bastard Wine.  But! each state has plenty of Fat Bastards.

Nebraska

-State law prohibits bars from selling beer unless they are simultaneously brewing a kettle of soup.

California

-In the 1940's, California law made it illegal to serve alcohol to a homosexual person in a bar.

Iowa

-It’s illegal to start a tab at a bar.  They have credit cards in Iowa?